Recently a friend asked me what the payoff is for my “Shame Shit Storms.”
This is a painful and somewhat embarrassing question to answer.
Here’s what I came up with . . . My shame allows me to:
- stay safely in my comfort zone, which allows me to
- avoid being seen, which allows me to
- escape being hurt.
Looking at this list makes me uncomfortable. How can it be? I like seeing myself as a strong and capable woman, not a fragile and frightened little girl!
But in my heart I know staying in my comfort zone means I don’t have to take a stand — for myself, for others, for love. If I’m shamed back into my little corner, I can bypass doing my inner work. I can give in unchallenged to my defeating beliefs that I am lazy and worthless. That I am broken beyond repair.
Ultimately, I can avoid taking responsibility for myself and my life.
Which is pretty fucking ironic considering I am the FOUNDER of the Church of Personal RESPONSIBILITY!